We all have them: days when nothing feels right from the moment we open our eyes. In Hebrew, the term Yom Kasheh (יום קשה) refers to “a hard day” and it sums up very well those days when everything feels a bit heavy and much more exhausting than it typically does. A Yom Kasheh can come in the form of emotional overwhelm, physical exhaustion, or unexpected challenges piling on.
The truth is that while we cannot help when these tough days hit, we can always control how we respond. With the right mindset and tools, even the hardest days can become manageable – and sometimes even meaningful.
In this guide, we will look at practical and emotional approaches to overcoming a Yom Kasheh. These tips will help you stress, grief, anxiety, burnout, and most importantly, reset, recharge, and reclaim your peace.
1. Acknowledge it: “Today is a Yom Kasheh.”
The first step in surviving a hard day is identifying it. Sometimes, not acknowledging that you’re having a hard day makes you resist. It’s perfectly acceptable to claim, “This is a Yom Kasheh,” as it demonstrates that one is human.
Acknowledging and validating your struggle makes space for healing. You can stop the act of pretending everything is okay and show yourself the grace to authentically deal with it.
Tip: Start your journal or planner with the phrase, “Today feels hard and that’s okay.”
2. Pause and Breathe
Another way to manage stress is deep, mindful breathing as our bodies tend to manifest anxiety in a physical way, including a tight chest, racing thoughts or shallow breathing.
Even five minutes of mindful breathing can switch on the parasympathetic nervous system, calming the body and clearing the mind.
Practice: Inhale for 4 counts, hold for 4, exhale for 6. Repeat for 5 cycles.
3. It’s Not Giving Up
If you are experiencing self-imposed stress, adjust your expectations. Actually, what many consider lowering the bar should be the realistic standard for rough days. Perfection should not be the goal on tough days.
Instead, try asking yourself, “What is the bare minimum I can do today that would still allow me to take care of myself?”
This mindset is called radical self-compassion, and is intended for compassion, not a reason to fall asleep on the couch.
Example: Instead of preparing a whole meal, start by microwaving something simple. In place of tackling all your emails, for today just address the most pressing one.
4. Comfort Rituals
Having life’s routines become too much can be agitating, but a comfort ritual will help regulate how you feel. A comfort ritual is a small thing but can be done repeatedly to provide you peace, like sipping tea, listening to the sounds of rain, watching comfort TV, or lighting up a candle.
They help you feel more centered and provide a sense of control during a day when there is too much happening.
Try the following: prepare a “Yom Kasheh Kit” for yourself, including: a blanket, your go to snack, essential oils, and a playlist that helps you unwind.
5. Limit Negative Inputs
On hard days, your energy is precious, so treat it like what it is sacred – negative social media, news, and even certain people should be avoided.
You don’t need to read about tragedies when you are feeling trapped in one yourself. Surrounding yourself with the right people and environment is crucial during this time so focus on healing instead of pressure or comparison.
Tip: Turn off social media and other digital platforms for a few hours. Mute notifications, and select calmness over chaos.
6. Talk it Out (with Another Person) or Note it Down.
Restraint intensifies when an individual is confronted with pain. When feelings become overwhelming, consider speaking to someone you trust, be it a therapist or even a close friend or family member. You will be surprised at the relief there exists just from the simple acknowledgment of ‘I am struggling today’.
If talking is too much, try expressing yourself through writing. It can be very effective. Simply grab a journal and write yourself or with the day an imaginary letter. Explain how you are feeling, what you wish would change, and jot down your observations.
Writing Prompt: “If I want to extend a kindness to myself today, that would be…”
7. Move Gently—Your Body
Great bodily movement, or any type of exercise, may also act as effective medicine. Getting the heart rate up is not necessary at times. Achieving a simple stretch, going for a walk, or even having a good dance to that song you loved as a child can ecstatically improve one’s mood.
Physical activity supports the freeing of built tension in the body, thus providing a increase in one’s mental wellbeing whilst releasing feel good hormones known as endorphins.
Just a note: Don’t exercise just because you feel need ‘to burn the calories’. Strive to enhance that feeling of yours.
8. Look After Yourself—Diet
During periods when the body is undergoing a Yom Kasheh phase, it may seem rather appealing to eat junk food or skip meals entirely. Your body, especially when being stressed, will not function without real nourishment, so it is advisable to try to eat something even when simple and devoid of garnishing.
Consuming warm foods such as soup, tea, oatmeal, and rice not only provides comfort but is also easy on the stomach. Staying hydrated is just as important; dehydration, for example, can mimic anxiety symptoms.
Pro Tip: Stock up on easily accessible comfort meals for days like this.
9. Remind Yourself: This Day Will Pass
It can feel like the weight of a situation will last forever, but it won’t. A Yom Kasheh is temporary, even if it’s extreme. Tell yourself: “This is just today. The next day could be better.”
Sometimes, the goal is just to survive. Not “fix everything”, “transform pain into purpose” – just making it through the day is the victory.
Affirmation: “I’ve survived 100% of my hard days so far.”
10. End the Day with Gentle Closure
At the end of the day, try to save a moment for closure. Intentionally, that might mean coming up with three things you ’ve survived, saying a prayer, or just taking a hot shower to literally wash off the day.
Closure allows the brain to appreciate that the tough days does have a finish line and reminds it that it was crossed.
Wind-down Ritual: Dimming the lights, adding calming scents like lavender, and doing slow relaxing stretches before sleep.
Final Thoughts: Seeking Purpose in the Pain
It is okay to not feel okay.
Yom Kasheh days as said in the reading are not symptoms of any failure. They might be part of getting over something deeper, developing further, or just part of ‘life’ cycles. “No one is strong all the time.” Remember, what counts the most is the kindness you treat yourself with, and here, it should be the benevolence a caregiver shows to their patient.
If you bond enough surviving days together, you might discover that true strength is the result of enduring what arises when one has utterly run out of willpower.
